How to Make a Good Decision? 6 Life-Changing Skills of Decision Making

 

 

How to Make a Good Decision? 6 Life-Changing Skills of Decision Making

 

Many of us start to get nervous or are even fearful when it comes to making decisions. Some people never really thought about this issue and lack the essential skills that it takes to make a good choice. Especially in these turbulent times, we are confronted with a lot of meaningful and difficult decisions:

What to do in the future? Should I start a new career? Should I dare buy a property in times of uncertainty and skyrocketing interest rates? Should I buy an electric car or stick with petrol? Should we get kids in such times, or is waiting better?

Many of these sometimes life-changing decisions give us headaches and often sleepless nights.

We always aim to make the right decision in every situation of our lives, but how can we manage that? Is it better to listen to the head or to give in to our feelings and emotions? Or should we consider both?

 

Life is the sum of our choices, and they ultimately determine our happiness

 

We make hundreds of them daily, and most of them unconsciously. Many daily decisions hardly have any impact, while others have severe consequences and can change our lives entirely. Life makes us choose everyday:

Coffee or tea? T-shirt or sweater? Self-employed or employed? Live together or not? Have children now, or better wait? Start a new career or stay in a stable job?

Many of us wish for a magic crystal ball to see the future before making a difficult decision. It would be so convenient as the fear of making the wrong decision would disappear.

Especially this fear hinders us from deciding between all the available options.

 

How to make a hard decision? Stop avoiding and postponing them!

 

When confronted with a difficult decisions we are often asking ourselves questions like:

Is this really the right decision? What happens if I make the wrong decision? How am I supposed to know what the right thing to do is? Should I rather listen to my feelings or my head? Or is taking both into account the key to success?

Perfectionism is another factor that influences our decision-making process. Many people are concerned whether the choice they make will bring the best possible result. They weigh all the pros and cons and have a hard time coming up with a final conclusion. Eventually, the decision is postponed over and over again, and even when it’s finally made, they are still doubting their choice.

The possibility of making one’s own decisions is both freedom and a burden. After all, every choice comes with its consequences.

Avoiding decisions seems to make our lives much easier. We don’t have to dig deep and discover what we want. Important decisions often bring up doubts, inner turmoil, insecurities, weaknesses, or even traumas. Our subconscious often tells us from the start to avoid digging deeper and putting off making a decision.

The most common reason for decision-making avoidance is fear of personal responsibility. It goes hand in hand with the fear of making the wrong choice or dealing with unpleasant consequences.

 

How To Make a Good Decision: My Life My Decisions!

 

When we make a choice, we often have to justify it to others to show or prove that it is reasonable and “right“. Society, media, and especially social media nowadays make this incredibly difficult for many people. These institutions define a small range of what is acceptable and what is not.

Standing for one’s opinions and convictions often requires a fair amount of self-confidence. That’s why many take the easy way and make their decisions depending on the beliefs and views of society, or they don’t make a choice at all.

Many also find it difficult because they never learned to take the time to find out what it takes to make the right decisions in life. There may be some general advice or tips from friends, but uncertainty and doubts come up again if it comes to difficult decisions.

 

Decidophobia and the Tactic of Delaying Decisions

 

Decidophobia is the fear of making the wrong decision. Decisions we face can trigger feelings of distress, helplessness, being overwhelmed, or even fear. Additionally, we often impose internal pressure on ourselves and expectations, deadlines, and pressure put on us from outside.

That’s why we often develop various strategies that help us to avoid making a decision. These include procrastination or letting others decide what to do. The responsibility for the outcome is then on them, and we no longer have to deal with it.

Sometimes a decision is delayed until the choice becomes obvious simply because certain options are no longer available. We let deadlines pass or even (unconsciously) manipulate situations for this to happen.

 

This sort of escape behavior works for a while as we escape the unpleasant situation and don’t have to take responsibility for our decision. However, this strategy has some negative consequences in the long run.

If we fail to make important decisions with courage, we usually hand over the wheel to those around us who are ready to leap.

In addition, with every decision we put off or postpone, we initiate a vicious cycle that increasingly diminishes our self-confidence, self-determination, and decision-making ability. We don’t manage to get behind the wheel of our lives but rather drive in autopilot mode or hand the wheel over to others.

You may now ask yourself which kind of decision-maker you are. Do you tend to make them based on your feelings or more rationally? Or do you usually manage to make a choice based on the combination of your heart and your head?

 

Making no decision is making a decision!

 

Perhaps you feel like you are a person who simply cannot make decisions. However, this is a fallacy: If we look closer we realize there is no such thing as making no decision. With every decision that is delayed or put off, we make a decision. The decision to maintain the status quo, in which we leave everything as it is or simply don’t act.

Suppose you can’t decide to go on vacation to Italy or Greece and wait until all the flights are fully booked, or the hotels are too expensive. In that case, you have unintentionally decided to spend your vacation at home.

In this Toolkit, you’ll learn a structured step-by-step process to help you make future decisions wisely and with confidence. You will find proven strategies and methods that you can use for any future decision.

 

 

 

The 6 Essential Skills Of Decision-Making

 

1.) Clarity: What type of decision-maker am I?

 

The first skill is to become aware of the type of decision-maker you are. Think about how you have made particularly hard and life-changing decisions in the past. During this process, you may find that you tend to make decisions too fast and spontaneously or put them off until the last minute. Also, ask yourself if you mostly make decisions based on your gut feeling, or are you a more rational person weighing all the pros and cons?

This exercise will give you a clear picture of your general decision-making behavior.

 

2.) Taking stock of my current situation

 

Before going into detail and looking at all your options, it makes sense to analyze your current situation. Consider where you are in life and where you want to go. Think of the general impact the decision will have on your life. And remember to consider all the other people who might or will be affected by the decision.

These two skills of decision making lay the foundation for the other steps.

 

3.) Skills of Decision-Making: Are these my only options?

 

The third decision-making is knowing ALL your options. When we must make a decision, two options often pop up in our heads. Starting a new career or staying at the current job? Splitting up or giving the relationship another chance?

Our thoughts are circling only around these two options and what consequences they might have. We consider which is the better choice and mentally play out both scenarios.

This creates some kind of black-and-white thinking, and we sometimes completely forget that in addition to options A and B, there may also be options C and D or a combination of entirely different scenarios available to us.

Do some creative brainstorming and develop as many options as possible. Try to be open and don’t immediately discard options that might seem unrealistic. Being creative and open-minded often brings up some great options that we would never come up with without thinking outside the box. After creating your list, you can take a detailed look at each possible choice. Identify their pros and cons and if they are realistic. The worksheet in the Decision-Making Toolkit will guide you along this process.

 

4.) Authentic Decision-Making: Your decision should be aligned with your values and personality

 

We are all unique. We all have our own personalities, values, priorities, desires, ideas, traits, and goals. Therefore, it is usually not very helpful if we orient too much on the outside and the advice of others.

Ultimately, we are the ones who have to make our own decisions and live with the consequences.

What might be the right choice and the key to happiness for one person can be an absolute disaster and a nightmare for another. And that is why it is so important that our decision is genuine. By this, we mean it suits our unique personality, circumstances, and goals.

In this exercise, you will look at the options and make an authenticity check for each.

 

5.) Should I make decisions with my heart or my head?

 

When it comes to decision making everyone involves heart and head to varying degrees. Many ask themselves: Is it better to listen to my mind and rational arguments, or should I trust my heart and gut feeling?

Ideally, the answer is a combination of both elements! Our emotional impulses are often spontaneous and give us an initial tendency, while our head allows us to analyze and reflect on the situation in detail.

We should try to involve our emotions and mind equally in decision-making.

In this article, we will look in more detail at both components’ role in decision-making. The Ultimate Decision-Making Toolkit includes an exercise to balance our hearts and our heads when making decisions.

 

6.) The decision has been made! Let’s implement it!

 

The time has come! The final decision-making skill is implementation.

At this stage you know which type of decision-maker you are. You have analyzed your status quo, weighed all options, and made sure you chose one aligned with your personality, goals, and values. Ideally, you have made a choice to which both your heart and your head loudly say, “Yes! Let’s do it”.

A perfect decision feels right and motivates us to implement it and take action. The best way to do this is to create a detailed action plan. Think about what steps are necessary to implement your decision. Become aware of your to-do’s priorities and order, and consider all the skills and resources needed for the implementation.

 

You may also realize that you need some external support. So you should inform those who could help you and those who are directly affected by your decision. Letting others know what you decided shows them and also yourself that you are serious and committed. Here’s a tool that will help you with these steps.

And the most important: Stand by your decision. Wipe out the last doubts and insecurities and focus on the positive outcome you expect. It’s time to roll up your sleeves and implement your decision.